Disciples of The Leader Otis,
Brother Henry here.
Howloween is tomorrow! Leader Otis taught us the following:
Howloween is also known as “Black Cat Day”. Since at least the Middle Ages these unfortunate souls have been vilified in human mythology. They have difficulty getting adopted from shelters and heartless and cruel people often torture them on the human holiday known as Halloween. Otis was appalled by the unfair treatment of his dark-furred brothers and sisters and he officially designated October 31st as a day to celebrate all black cats. It is also a day for all Disciples of Otis to be especially vigilant in watching out for the safety of cats in their neighborhoods. People will be less likely to attempt to harm animals if they know we are all watching out for them.
This Howloween I intend to honor Leader Otis’s wishes and keep a sharp eye out for the poor outdoor kitties in our neighborhood!
Tomorrow night, I shall sit right here in the front window, keeping an ever-vigilant watch to ensure that no one is mistreating my feline brothers and sisters in the world without walls. This spot is perfect! It is elevated so I get a great view of my surroundings. It is well-decorated with candles and pumpkins that have little black cats popping out of them. It is also very cushy so I will not experience any bum discomfort from long-term, vigilant sitting!
This spot is also close to the door, so if any kitties need a safe haven I will be able to… well… I can’t actually open the door… but maybe I’ll be able to yowl at the Guardians and make them open the door! Yes! That’s what I’ll do! I’ll yowl and the Guardians will open the door and let the kitties run in to safety! It’s a perfect plan!
Wait a second though… to humans, Howloween is “Halloween”. They celebrate the day by dressing their children up in silly and/or frightening costumes and unleashing them on the neighborhood to beg for high calorie, low nutrition food stuffs. That means a steady stream of little kids with very sticky hands is going to be coming to the door all night! Kitties can’t come through there! If they tried, they would end up getting pet by all those sticky hands and their fur would be disgusting! And if I’m too close to the door, those sticky hands might be trying to pet me too! Yuck!
Yeah. On second thought this perch just won’t do. I think that side window over there would be much better. It’s got all the advantages of this spot minus the possibility of my fur getting all sticky.
Plus, if one of those little sticky-fingered nightmares gets past the Guardians, I’ll have enough time to make a break for my safey-safe in the office closet. So I’ll be able to keep an eye on the neighborhood and minimize my chances for my own personal Howloween nightmare. Yep. Sounds good to me… and I’m pretty sure Leader Otis would approve. He would want me to be vigilant, but not foolhardy. Have a safe Howloween everybody, and may your fur remain un-sticky.
So Says Brother Henry