My Nose Does Not Lie

Disciples of The Leader Otis,

Brother Henry here.

Yesterday Brother Oliver and I both wanted to nap in the same place at the same time. You see, there’s this ottoman that the Guardians put under a window right next to the TV. They also placed a Sacred Orange Pillow of Enlightenment on it. There is nothing better than laying your head down on the pillow while stretching out on the cushy surface of the ottoman, but only one cat can do this at once. Unfortunately, Brother Oliver arrived at the ottoman shortly before I did so he got the pillow. Fortunately, Brother Oliver’s behind is almost as cushy as the pillow so we worked out a compromise.

Brother Oliver and I both wanted to nap on the Ottoman and pillow. We worked out a compromise.

Stinky Sandal Sunday

Disciples of The Leader Otis,

Brother Henry here. The past week was exhausting and stressful. I worried myself sick while The Leader was at the specialty Bad Place, and I worked double-time keeping Him safe when He returned. I was very thankful today when Sir Thomas offered to take over my security duties for the day so I could get some rest. When I laid down to nap though, I found that I couldn’t sleep because I had developed a very bad tension headache.

I tried to take a nap, but I had a headache.

As I lay there rubbing my aching head. I suddenly detected a powerful, wonderful scent. The smell pierced through the pain and begged me to seek out its source. I quickly discovered that it was coming from one of the Guardians flip-floppy sandals. I inhaled deeply, savoring the smelly goodness.

The wonderful scent was coming from one of the Guardian’s flip-floppy sandals.

The scent was like super-stinky magic. My headache was gone immediately, and I was filled with visions of a warm, moist, and possibly garbage-filled cave. I was mesmerized.

I was mesmerized, mentally transported to a warm, moist, garbage-filled cave.

I completely forgot all about the stresses of the week. All I could focus on was that scent. I loved that scent. I wanted to be one with that scent. I began rubbing my head and face all over the stinky sandal so that I could take that smell with me wherever I went.

I wanted to become one with the smell. I rubbed it all over myself.

And now, here I sit, refreshed and stinky. Ready to take on whatever this day has in store for me. I declare this day “Stinky Sandal Sunday”!

I declare today “Stinky Sandal Sunday”!

And now I shall travel forth and rub this scent on all who cross my path. I am confident that it will be greatly appreciated, and it will bring all who smell it the same sense of calmness and inner peace that it has given me.

So Says Brother Henry

PS- Brother Oliver says that we have continued to receive daily inquiries from people and fur people who would like to chip in for Leader Otis’s or Mama’s medical expenses. We continue to be overwhelmed by the outpouring of concern, and we cannot thank you all enough for the support. For those who would like to contribute, you can do so on the Paypal website. Just put our email address in the “To” field. It is: cultofotis@gmail.com. We will also post this link on our Facebook page so it can be found more easily. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

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