I Think I’m a Hipster

My Disciples,

First let Me just say how much I appreciate Brother Henry filling in for Me the past couple days. He did a good job keeping you all in the loop, although I honestly would have preferred that he keep that thing about the rat butt to himself. Oh well, as Brother Henry informed you, I have been having some soreness in My right hip that seems to be getting worse. I hate it, not only because it makes Me limp, but also because it means I have to go to The Bad Place more.

On Monday, the Guardians took Me to a Bad Place that I had never been to before. The people there were very nice, but I was too terrified to really pay attention to what was being said about Me. I do know they were talking a lot about My sore hip though. For some reason, in My frightened haze, I focused on that word, “hip”. A memory was triggered of the time I heard the Guardians talking about something called a “hipster”. I recalled that they didn’t seem to be all that excited about hipsters, so it occurred to Me that maybe hipsters are bad. Then I thought, “Wait a second… I have a bad hip. Maybe it’s not the hipsters that are bad, maybe a hipster is someone with a bad hip. I must be a hipster!”

Otis not happy to be a hipster

I have a bad hip. I guess that makes me a hipster. This sucks.

So now, not only am I dealing with the newly discovered knowledge that I am a hipster, the Guardians have started moving My hip around more. I’m assuming the people at the Bad Place told them to do this. I’m not sure yet how I feel about it, but so far I’m just letting the Guardians do their thing. It’s funny though, I assume that since they know My hip is bad, they must also know I’m a hipster. When I think back on their conversation about hipsters I can recall them saying that hipsters always drink something called “PBR”. I have no idea what that is, but if it is a magic potion that helps to take away the pain of bad hips, I hope they get Me some soon!

So Sayeth Otis


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Filed under Daily Life

15 responses to “I Think I’m a Hipster

  1. Otis you are totally a hipster cat!

  2. PBR? If I were you, I’d demand a nice chardonnay instead… Hope your hip feels better soon!

  3. I hope you are feeling better soon my hipster pal!

  4. My Leader Otis…I send you my most special and healing paw pats…soft ones…just for you, Savvy

  5. Otis, we are cheered you are feeling well enough to write again. RC Cat insists to warn you about being hip to warm aqua exercise.
    RC Cat: “while dogs may love it, such soaking is too disturbing for catkind….So if you hear anything about swimming…limp away fast Leader Otis! Find a hidden spot! All the Our realm is purring warmth and waterless comfort.”

  6. These posts are delightful – I just drooled saliva while bursting out in laughter when I read about going to “the Bad Place.” I’m very grateful you were freshly pressed on a later post.

  7. Pingback: I Think I’m Getting A Hipsterectomy | The Blog of Otis

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