Tag Archives: stairs

Non-slip Sunday

My Disciples,

As you may recall, a couple weeks ago one of the Guardians took a tumble down the stairs. After that, the other Guardian decided to make the stairs safer, although we were a little confused about what she was doing at first. Anyway, the new, safer stairs are now complete! They have been painted with a sandy-textured paint that makes them a lot less slippery, so I am declaring today Non-slip Sunday!

Otis on new stairs

The new stairs look much nicer, and they are far less slippery!

Even though the new stairs are less slippery, I’m kinda worried that the clumsy Guardian might still find a way to slip on them. I think I should demonstrate how to properly walk on stairs so that the Guardian might learn to do so safely. I’m still limping quite a bit from My Hipsterectomy, so if I can safely walk these stairs, an unimpaired human should be able to do so as well.

Otis demonstrates stair walking

Guardian, please pay attention. Take the stairs one at a time, watch where you are going and be careful. If I can do it, you can do it.

Here’s hoping we make it through Non-slip Sunday, and all of the days that follow, with zero stair related injuries!

So Sayeth Otis

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One Of The Guardians Is Clumsy

My Disciples,

Two nights ago, one of the Guardians slipped on our basement staircase and he had to take a trip to the human Bad Place. I overheard the Guardians talking when they got back, and it sounded like My clumsy guardian was going to be OK. I guess he had all kinds of radumographs taken at the Bad Place and nothing was broken. Still, he looked pretty sore.

Otis on stairs

This is where the Guardian fell. I guess he landed on his back. Oh, and yes! That’s Me walking up the stairs. I’m getting better!

I was telling Brothers Henry and Oliver about what had happened, and I was shaking My head in amazement at how clumsy humans can be. Then, Brother Oliver reminded Me that I had once slid all the way down that same staircase backward. Brother Henry joined in, saying that he remembered it too. I admit, they were right, but I had tried to forget that incident. Remembering it gave Me much more sympathy for the Guardian, so when he stayed home all day yesterday I snuggled up to him on the couch. I think it helped him feel better.

So Sayeth Otis

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It’s Super Staircase Sunday!

My Disciples,

This morning, when I went to eat breakfast, Thomas was sitting in the enclosed area at the bottom of the stairs that lead to Kitty Valhalla. He was all excited and asked, “Leader Otis, is it Sunday?” When I told him it was, he got even more excited and asked, “Can today be ‘Super Staircase Sunday?” When I asked him why he wanted it to be Super Staircase Sunday he said, “Well, ever since the Guardians made it so I could go up and down the stairs from Valhalla, I have had so much more room for activities! The stairs are really great for activities! Let me demonstrate!” He then proceeded to show Me all of the activities that he could do on the stairs. I told Brother Oliver to bring the camera so we could document it.

Thomas shy at top of stairs

First, Thomas went to the top of the staircase and said, “I can be shy at the top of the stairs!”.

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I Almost Died!

My Disciples,

Oh My gosh!  I almost died last night!  It all started when one of the Guardians was getting ready to go outside to give some catnip to Poppy, Franklin (formerly known as “Hissy“) and a few other Limbo kitties.  I was excited because I knew I would get to go into My Outdoor Domain while the Guardian was visiting the other kitties.

Anticipating the cool night breeze and the aromas it would bring, I ran toward the door.  In mid-stride, I turned to see if the Guardian was following, and just then the ground dropped out from under Me.  I suddenly found Myself sliding backward and downward at high speed!  I thought I was done for, and My whole life began to flash before My eyes.  Just as I was getting to the part of My life where I fought an epic battle with a potty demon, I came to an abrupt stop on a cold hard floor.  I looked up to find that I was sitting at the bottom of the basement stairs!

Otis at bottom of stairs

I don't know what happened, but I somehow slid backwards all the way down the stairs!

I was dazed and disoriented.  All thoughts of My Outdoor Domain had been driven from My mind during the crazy, downward slide.  Leaning against the wall for support, I slowly made My way back to the top of the stairs.

Otis climbing stairs.

It was a struggle in My dazed state, but I slowly made My way back to the top of the stairs.

When I reached the top, I shouted for help, and Brother Oliver came running.  He listened intently as I recounted My harrowing tale.  As I finished the story, Brother Oliver seemed to be struggling to contain his emotion.  He stared at Me with a neutral look that was clearly forced, but his trembling lip betrayed his barely contained inner turmoil.  I can only imagine that he was horrified at the thought of what had just happened to Me, and he was overcome with relief that I was OK.

I turned My gaze back toward the stairs and told Brother Oliver, “It’s OK if you want to cry.  I’ll understand.”  Just then Brother Oliver raised his head and perked up his ears.  He said, “What’s that Brother Henry!?  Ok!  I’ll be right there!”  And then he ran off toward the living room.  I hadn’t heard Brother Henry call, so I figured that Brother Oliver was just looking for an excuse to go let his emotions out in private.

Otis and Oliver at top of stairs.

Brother Oliver seemed to be struggling with his emotions as I recounted My harrowing tale.

When Brother Oliver was out of sight, I heard him let his emotions burst forth.  It was kind of weird.  I’m sure he must have been crying, but the sounds that were pouring out of him sounded almost like laughter.  Poor Brother Oliver.  I didn’t mean to give him such a scare.  It is comforting to know, though, that he understood the seriousness of this incident and is concerned about My welfare.  I would expect nothing less from one of My High Priests.

So Sayeth Otis

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