Tag Archives: scratcher

This Year’s Puzzling Catsmas Gift: Part IV

Disciples of Otis,

Brother Oliver here.

When we last left off, Sir Thomas had decided that the weird bench was “The Bench of Infinite Wiener Vigilance”. I didn’t think that was quite right, so I knocked him out of the way and inspected the object further. That’s when it came to me. I said, “Brother Henry was right! This is’The Bench of Infinite Scratching’! And he was also right when he said this is ‘The Bench of Infinite Mouse Slaying’!” Looking downtrodden, Sir Thomas said “So Brother Henry was totally right, and I was completely wrong?”

Catsmas gift 15

I declared that Brother Henry was right about the bench. Sir Thomas was upset because he thought that meant he was wrong.

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This Year’s Puzzling Catsmas Gift: Part III

Disciples of Otis,

Brother Oliver here.

When we last left off, Brother Henry had claimed that the weird bench was in fact, “The Bench of Infinite Mouse Slaying”. Sir Thomas said that he had a different idea and asked Brother Henry to step aside. Brother Henry did so and Sir Thomas took up position on top of the bench. As he did so he said, “Ah-ha! Just as I suspected. You guys, when I sit up here I am raised quite a distance off the floor. I can see much farther than I could from the ground, I mean, at least several inches farther if not more.”

Catsmas gift 9

Sir Thomas said that he could see several inches farther from the top of the bench.

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This Year’s Puzzling Catsmas Gift: Part II

Disciples of Otis,

Brother Oliver here.

When we last left off, Brother Henry had just noticed something and asked Sir Thomas and I to stand back so he could demonstrate the true purpose of the mysterious object we were investigating. After Thomas and I did as he asked, Brother Henry jumped down off the weird bench and crouched down behind it. One second passed… then two. Suddenly Brother Henry sprung up and reached over the bench with his right forepaw. As he did so he shouted, “You’re mine!” and then he brought his paw down on a colorful toy mouse that was sitting in front of the bench.

Catsmas gift 6

Brother Henry hid behind the bench and then struck out at a toy mouse.

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This Year’s Puzzling Catsmas Gift: Part I

Disciples of Otis,

Brother Oliver here.

The Guardians have given us some mysterious Catsmas gifts in years past, but this year’s gift caused even more debate than usual among the Inner Circle. What was this strange object? And what was its ultimate purpose?

Catsmas gift 1

This is the gift we received. What was its purpose?

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Plenty of Posing Benches

My Disciples,

You may recall that some time ago the Guardians gave us a fancy posing bench.  We all loved it, especially when we discovered we could scratch it. In fact, we all loved it so much that we started getting into little spats about who should be allowed to pose on the bench at any given time. Eventually, the Guardians tired of our arguments and locked the bench away in a closet. We thought we would never see the bench again, but Brother Henry entered the living room yesterday to find Brother Oliver perched atop the bench in a relaxed pose!

Return of the Posing Bench

Brother Henry entered the living room to find Brother Oliver posing on the bench!

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Maybe It’s Not a Posing Bench

My Disciples,

After My discovery that the strange cardboard object in the living room must be a posing bench (or maybe a sleeping bench), Brothers Oliver and Henry were very excited to give it a try. Brother Oliver went first. He started with a majestic pose, looking off to his left as toward some distant horizon.

Oliver Posing 1

Brother Oliver started by striking a majestic pose, as if he were looking toward a distant horizon.

He then looked upward, as if he were looking to the stars for some form of insight or inspiration. The pose was quite inspirational!

Oliver Posing 2

Next, Brother Oliver looked up. The pose was inspirational.

At this point, Brother Henry insisted that it was his turn. Brother Oliver acquiesced to Brother Henry’s wishes, no doubt because he had recently received an impressive smackdown from The Muscle of The Cult of Otis. Brother Henry sat in front of the posing bench and tried to do his own version of “looking toward the distant horizon”. As he was getting situated, we were all amazed to see Thomas walk up behind him. Thomas said, “Ummmm… Mr. Henry? What the heck are you looking at?”

Thomas and Henry with strange object

As Brother Henry was getting situated, Thomas came up behind him and asked what he was looking at.

Brother Henry said, “Thomas! You startled Me! I’m still getting used to you wandering around the house. Since you asked, I’m not really looking at anything, but this is a posing bench here in front of Me. I’m trying to strike an inspirational pose in front of it!”  Thomas replied, “That cardboard thing is a posing bench? Really!? That’s weird. I thought it was a scratcher. In fact, I had a ton of fun scratching it last night after you all went downstairs to sleep in the Guardians’ room.” Thomas then shook his head and said, “Guess I still have a lot to learn about this indoor life…” before he turned and wandered off. Brother Henry sat for a moment and then jumped up as if he had been inspired. He declared, “I’m going to try a different pose!”

Henry with new scratcher

After Thomas told Brother Henry that he had been using the posing bench as a scratcher, Brother Henry was inspired to try a different pose.

Both Brother Oliver and I thought that Brother Henry’s new pose looked like a lot of fun. For the next hour, we all took turns imitating that pose, and we all agreed that it would look more convincing if we actually did scratch the posing bench while we did it. I mean, it definitely IS a posing bench and not a scratcher. How could the new kid know better than we three seasoned indoor kitties!?

So Sayeth Otis

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The Posing Bench

My Disciples,

Yesterday afternoon, the Guardians put something strange out in the middle of the living room. It was hard and curved and cardboard. Brothers Henry and Oliver discovered it first, and they were at a loss to determine what it was.

Oliver and Henry with mystery object

The Brothers discovered the strange object first. They couldn’t figure out what it was.

Stumped, The Brothers told Me about the thing in the living room. I had to see it for Myself. I limped in there to take a look. It was indeed strange.

Otis with mystery object

The Brothers were right, this object was bizarre.

I looked closer and found that the wavy cardboard thing was covered in catnip. This indicated to Me that the Guardians definitely wanted the Brothers and Me to use this mystery object.

Otis with mystery object 2

The object was covered in catnip. Clearly the Guardians wanted The Brothers and Me to use it.

Then I had a flash of inspiration. I remembered when the Guardians were looking at a book full of pictures of themselves when they were kids. In some of the photos, they were posing on random, weirdly shaped objects. I deduced that this cardboard thing must be some kind of posing bench for kitties! I decided to give it a try. Sure enough, as soon as I posed one of the Guardians snapped a photo of Me!

Otis with mystery object 3

Yes! I think I figured it out. This weird thing was meant to be posed on for photos.

I was thrilled that I had figured out what the mysterious object was for, but I also discovered that the object was very comfortable. It wasn’t long before the posing bench became a sleeping bench.

Otis with mystery object 4

I fell asleep on the posing bench. It was just too comfortable.

When I woke up, My cheek was a bit slobbery, but I was pleased to find that most of My drool had been collected in the numerous cardboard channels in the posing bench. This made Me wonder though, was the primary purpose of the bench posing or sleeping? In the end I decided that I may never know. After all, the Guardians work in mysterious ways…

So Sayeth Otis

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Offerings From the Guardians

My Disciples,

The other day the Guardians of Otis brought home several offerings to present to The Brothers and Me.  I was extremely anxious to see what they had brought, but I must say I was unimpressed with the first few items they revealed.  Their initial offering was a strangely shaped claw sharpener called the “Scratch Lounger.”  Brother Oliver rubbed his head agains it in appreciation, but I was less forgiving.

Brother Oliver rubs against the scratch lounger while Otis looks depressed nearby.

Brother Oliver showed his appreciation for the first offering. I was not impressed.

Brother Henry was even more excited by the Scratch Lounger offering.  He said it was just the right shape for him to practice some of his body guard defensive moves so he could better protect Me.  I was happy about that, but I still had no interest in the lounger.

Brother Henry lays on his side on the scratch lounger and bites one end of it.

Brother Henry said he could practice his moves on the Scratch Lounger, but it was boring to Me.

The Guardians could see that I wasn’t pleased, so they pulled another offering out of their bag.  This time it was a “Scratch Treehouse.”  Brother Oliver took to it immediately and began rubbing his face on it in appreciation.  I still wasn’t impressed.  I mean, it was called a treehouse, but it wasn’t even in a tree.  Maybe I just didn’t get it.

Brother Oliver rubs against the scratch treehouse while Otis looks bored.

Brother Oliver seemed to appreciate the Scratch Treehouse. I don't know why.

Seeing that I still wasn’t pleased, the Guardians pulled yet another offering out of their offering bag.  This time it was some kind of combination maze and scratcher.  There were several differently-shaped holes in the side of the scratcher box and there was a ball with a bell inside of it.  I guess I was supposed to reach in through the holes and bat the ball around, but it seemed like a lot of work to me.

Otis lying next to a maze scratcher looking bored.

I guess the maze scratching thing was supposed to be intellectually stimulating. I was not stimulated.

To My surprise, the Guardians weren’t done giving offerings yet.  They reached into the bag once again and pulled out another object for My consideration.  This time it was the most glorious scratcher I had ever seen!  It was big and flat and shaped like a perfect rectangle!  I ran over and laid down on it immediately.  It had taken them four tries, but the Guardians had finally gotten it right.

Otis is laying on a flat, rectangular cardboard scratcher.

The Guardians had finally gotten it right. This was the most glorious scratcher ever.

As I lay on the best scratcher ever created, Brother Henry loafed on his training gym/Scratch Lounger, and Brother Oliver attempted to solve the mysteries of the scratch maze thingy.  Although I knew My scratcher was far superior, I allowed The Brothers to enjoy theirs without any snarky comments from Me.

Otis and The Brothers enjoy their respective scratchers.

I knew My scratcher was the best, but I allowed The Brothers to enjoy theirs in peace.

Even though I didn’t say anything, I think The Brothers secretly knew that My scratcher was the best.  They also knew that they shouldn’t challenge The Leader though, so instead they decided to take out their frustrations about having inferior scratchers on one another.  Brother Oliver wandered over to the Scratch Lounger and challenged Brother Henry.  It was unwise in My opinion.

Brother Henry and Brother Oliver Wrestle while Otis relaxes nearby.

I know they were just frustrated about their inferior scratchers, but The Brothers could have handled it better.

As Brother Henry moved with…well…with catlike speed and grabbed Brother Oliver around the neck, I knew that this encounter was about to get ugly.  Yeah, I could have given The Brothers a turn on my scratcher to alleviate their frustration, but I figured it couldn’t hurt for Brother Henry to get a little practice with a cat that is almost his size.  After all, he is My muscle, so he has to keep his strength and reflexes in top form to enforce My rules and decrees.  And since Brother Oliver is The Brains of this organization, it couldn’t hurt for him to learn a tough lesson either.

Making tough choices is what being The Leader is all about.  So as the two tabby titans battled it out I made yet another tough decision.  I decided it was time for Me to take a nap.

So Sayeth Otis

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