We Haven’t Forgotten About Valhalla

Disciples of Otis,

Brother Oliver here.

I just want you to know that we haven’t forgotten about Valahalla. We know Thomas is hiding something up there, and Brother Henry and I still intend to get to the bottom of it. I’ve even tried to sneak up there a couple times this past week, but each time I did I encountered Thomas on the stairs. He didn’t say a word. He just gave me this look:

This is the look Thomas gave me.

Operation Tired Mama Cat- Part II

My Disciples,

When we left off yesterday, Mama cat had just assumed a bipedal stance. I was anxiously awaiting what would happen next. To say it was awesome would be an understatement.

As the bird passed in front of Mama Cat, she performed a Power Pounce and scored a hit.

Operation Tired Mama Cat- Part I

My Disciples,

After the incident earlier this week when Mama Cat killed a crunchy birdie, the Guardians decided that maybe they better try to help Mama Cat release some of her pent up predatory tendencies. And what better way to do that than to let her practice her Catlympic skills! The Guardian’s were working on the assumption that, if Mama Cat exercised until she was tired, she would be more likely to just take a nap rather than slaughter a birdie. I didn’t tell Mama Cat that this was there intent though. I just told her that I had asked the Guardians to give her a training session. She was very excited by the news.

Mama Cat was excited about the possibility of a training session. She got into a ready stance as the session began.

Mama Cat’s Exhibition: Part III- The Big Finish

My Disciples,

When we left off yesterday, Mama Cat had just blown us away with the new move she calls “The Cold Frame Catapult”. She had landed back up on the  the cement wall, and was in a ready stance. Nothing, I mean NOTHING, could have prepared us for the performance that would follow.

As the handler made the next pass with the bird, Mama cat brought her foot down on it, stopping it cold. With an intense look on her face she said, “Stuff just got real!” I heard Brothers Henry and Oliver gasp in unison next to me.

Mama Cat’s Exhibition: Part II- Mama’s New Move

My Disciples,

When we left off yesterday, Mama’s exhibition had gotten off to a shaky start, but she had finally scored a hit and seemed to have regained her composure. As her exhibition continued, she amazed us all with something we had never seen before.

After scoring the hit, Mama opened her paws and released the bird. She seemed to be brimming with new confidence.

I Give Mama Some Good News

My Disciples,

After Brother Oliver informed Me of Cookie’s request, I went to My Outdoor Domain to see if Mama Cat was around. I went right up to the wire and called out, “Mama! Mama Cat! I need to speak to you!”

I went up to the wire and called out for Mama Cat.

A few moments passed, and then Mama Cat came through the spot in the fence where the Guardians had removed a board to give her easy access.

After a few minutes, Mama Cat appeared.

Mama cat kept her distance. She sat on a red table by the fence and said, somewhat curtly,  “Yes, Leader Otis? What is it?” I said, “Mama, I’m very sorry that the Catlympics have been delayed for so long. I know they mean a lot to you, and I just want you to know that I really did intend to hold them in the fall. My Hipsterectomy really derailed My plans though.” Mama said, “Really? That’s the real reason? Because I was starting to think that maybe you cancelled them because you didn’t want me to compete…”

I gasped, shocked that Mama would think that I cancelled the Catlympics for that reason. I looked at her for a moment, and then I stuck My tongue out and went, “THHHHHHHHHHHHHHHPT”.

Mama Cat thought I cancelled the Catlympics to stop her from competing. I responded by blowing a raspberry.

Looking puzzled by My response, Mama Cat said, “So you really didn’t cancel them because of me?” I said, “No, Mama Cat, it really was because of Me, not you. In fact, I came out here looking for you today because I want to ask you to put on a special exhibition performance of your Catlympic skills. I’m not sure when I’ll be able to hold the official Catlympic competition, but until I am able I want to make sure we are keeping the spirit of the Catlympics alive. I figured you would be the perfect kitty to do just that! Will  you do it?”

Upon hearing this, Mama Cat became very excited, she said, “Yes! I will do it. In fact, I’m going to start warming up right now!” She then started clawing energetically at a nearby tree.

Mama Cat was so excited about her exhibition that she started warming up immediately.

I said, “I love the enthusiasm, Mama Cat! That’s the true Catlympic spirit!” I need to find you an artificial bird handler and then we can get this show on the road.” As I turned to head back into the house, I heard Mama say, “Thanks so much Leader Otis! I’ll be ready and waiting when you find that handler! I won’t let you down!” I had no doubt that she was right.

So Sayeth Otis

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Cookie Makes A Request

My Disciples,

This morning it was actually nice enough outside that the Guardians kept the door to My Outdoor Domain open. Brother Oliver and I were out there for awhile, but I got a little chilled and came back inside. As I was leaving, I heard Brother Oliver say, someone’s behind the fence over there. I think I heard some movement.

As I was heading inside, Brother Oliver said he thought someone was behind the fence.

Later, Brother Oliver told Me that he had been right. Shortly after I left, Cookie appeared from behind the fence. Brother Oliver greeted her and asked how she was doing.

It was Cookie that had been behind the fence. Brother Oliver asked how she was doing.

Cookie said she was doing OK, but Mama cat has been driving her a little crazy. She said that Mama has been constantly going on about how she was told she would be able to compete in the 2012 Catlympics, but then the Catlympics never happened. Cookie said she tried to reason with Mama to make her understand that the Catlympics had been delayed due to The Leader’s Hipsterectomy and ongoing recovery, but Mama would hear none of it. Cookie was becoming very frustrated with the situation.

Cookie said that Mama had been driving her crazy talking about the cancelled Catlympics.

Brother Oliver asked Cookie if there was anything we could do to help. Cookie said that it might be helpful if we allowed Mama Cat to at least stage an exhibition. That way she would feel like the Catlympics had not been completely forgotten. Brother Oliver said he would see what he could do.

When Brother Oliver reported all of this to Me later on, I felt more than a little guilty that my surgerization had put such a damper on Mama Cat’s Catlympic ambitions. I decided to do something to remedy the situation.

So Sayeth Otis

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Mama Cat Stopped By!

My Disciples,

I’m so excited and relieved! I haven’t seen Mama Cat for several weeks, but when I went into My Outdoor Domain yesterday there she was! She was sitting on the cement wall by the garage next door! Now, I obviously wasn’t happy that she was still out in Limbo, but since she is an older kitty I feared that I hadn’t been seeing here because she was ill or something. She assured Me that this was not the case, and that she had only been staying inside lately because the weather had gotten so rainy. Apparently, her guardians are at least kind enough not to kick her out into the rain.

Mama Cat looked a little concerned sitting there on the wall, so I asked her what was on her mind. She said, “Well… ummm… Leader Otis, now that it’s fall, isn’t it about time for the Catlympics?”

Mama Cat looked concerned. She asked Me if it was almost time for the Catlympics.

The Catlympics! Of course! With My Art Thritis, all of the excitement of Thomas being swept up in The Capture, and with Domino and possibly Beatrice moving away, the Catlympics had slipped to the back of My mind. I understood why Mama Cat was so concerned. After all, she has been dreaming of becoming a Catlympian ever since she first heard about the games. She blew us away in tryouts, and she  even organized our first official Catlympic training camp.

I reassured Mama that we would still be holding some form of Catlympics, and that she would definitely be one of the featured cathletes. Upon hearing that, she got all excited and exclaimed, “Thanks Leader Otis!” before running back to her house and jumping in through the window that her guardians leave open. Now I just need to figure out how best to hold this year’s Catlympics what with one Cathlete in Limbo, The Brothers in the main area of the house and Thomas sequestered up in Kitty Valhalla! I don’t feel like competing Myself, because of My Art Thritis, but I can definitely still be Master of Ceremonies! Stay tuned, My Disciples. The 2012 Catlympics must go on!

So Sayeth Otis

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The Way of the Dragon… Belly

My Disciples,

After making amends to Thomas for My unprovoked tail attack, and regaining his trust, I decided that I should try to right another wrong. A few weeks back I tried to coach Thomas in the ways of the Catlympians. It didn’t go so well. I knew I could do better, so yesterday I gave it another try. After playing for awhile, I could tell that Thomas really had a good handle on the fundamentals, so I decided to tutor him in some advanced techniques. And what better way to start than with My own signature move that I call Dragon Belly?

I told Thomas to watch closely as I prepared to assume the position. As the toy handler made a pass with a simulated mouse, I began to roll over onto My back while saying, “See Thomas? You need to rotate your torso thusly, starting with your forelimbs, but be careful, it is easy to over-rotate and end up doing a full roll. If you lead with your forelegs though, your hind legs will follow.”

I told Thomas to rotate his forelegs first, and that his hind legs would follow.

Trying To Train Thomas

My Disciples,

I’m so embarrassed. Earlier today, Brother Henry and I were hanging out in Kitty Valhalla with Thomas. We were trying to figure out what we should do when Thomas asked, “Are the Catlympics still happening this fall?” When I told him they were he said, “Well, since I’m no longer out in Limbo with Mama Cat, how will I be able to train?”

As we were lounging in Valhalla trying to come up with something fun to do, Thomas asked about Catlympic training.