Disciples of The Leader Otis,
Brother Henry here.
This morning, just as I was drifting off into a nice, peaceful, after-breakfast nap, I was suddenly jarred awake when I heard a lady screaming. The scream sounded like it came from kitty Valhalla! Even though we have all been avoiding Valhalla since the weirdness that happened up there a week or so ago, I immediately ran toward Valhalla to see if I could be of assistance to the poor lady who had screamed. When I reached the stairs and looked up, I discovered that the lady was actually Brother Oliver.
As I started to climb the stairs I asked Brother Oliver what was going on. He said, “Brother Henry! It was terrible! It all started when the bigger guardian cleaned the litter boxes. When he finished, I decided to do what I always do… you know… go from box to box making a small deposit in each before anyone else gets a chance to do it. Anyway, without thinking, I headed up to Valhalla to use that box first. When I arrived in Valhalla, I… I used the box and then looked up and got the fright of a lifetime! It… well, just take a look for yourself! I’ll be over here on the stairs.” I rushed past Brother Oliver and jumped up on the bench in front of the window as he took up a safe position on the stairs.
As soon as I jumped up on the bench, my blood ran cold. The pink, plushy, grinning monster was back in the bucket with the rest of Thomas’s minions. He was holding a book.
I cautiously crept forward to take a closer look. I was prepared to turn and dart back down the stairs at the slightest sign of movement from the minions. When I got right up to the crazily smiling freak, I saw the title of the book he was holding. It was “Wiener Dog Art”. I then looked up into the thing’s creepy, vacant eyes and noticed something that sent shivers down my spine.
When I looked into the minion’s eyes, I noticed that instead of round pupils, each eye had a “W” at its center. A “W”! I could think of only one plausible explanation. The “W” must stand for “wiener”, as in “wiener dog”. The minion must be under the control of wiener dogs!
Shocked and a bit rattled, I turned to tell Brother Oliver what I had just discovered. As I turned my head though, my gaze fell upon a sight even more shocking than the wiener-possessed pink plushy. For a moment I just stared, unable to believe what I was seeing.
I jumped down to take a closer look. Surely that wasn’t what it appeared to be. Perhaps one of the Guardians was up here earlier and dropped a piece of chocolate candy or something. Nope. When I got closer I could verify the identity of the object with my nose as well as my eyes. It was poo!!!
Someone had pooed on the floor! And I was pretty sure I knew who. I said, “Brother Oliver! Get your stinky butt up here! I need to talk to you about something.”
So Says Brother Henry
Next- Plushy Poo Puzzle Part II: Whose Poo?