Uncovering The Secret Part III- All Is Revealed

Disciples of The Leader Otis,

Brother Henry here.

When we last left off, Brother Oliver had joined me in Kitty Valhalla, and I was about to open the curtains so we could both get a good look at what Thomas has been hiding up there. I did just that, and both Brother Oliver and I were dumbstruck by the sight that lay before us.

Thomas's Secret

I threw back the curtains and revealed Thomas’s secret. Click on the image to see it full size so you can witness the disturbing content for yourself!

Brother Oliver and I moved in closer so we could examine the terrifying collage that lay before us. Red lines radiated outward from a world map in the center of the collage. If we were interpreting what we were seeing correctly, Sir Thomas had uncovered a wiener dog conspiracy that spanned the globe!

Henry and Oliver investigating Thomas's secret

We examined the collage more closely. It seemed to point to a global wiener dog conspiracy!

There were wiener dogs wearing suits of armor and wieners outfitted for amphibious assault. There was an urban wiener dog assault vehicle called the “Wienermobile” and a terrifying genetically altered monster called a “Wiener Wolf”. Worst of all, there were several images of cats cavorting with wiener dogs. Over these images Thomas had taped the question “Traitor?”, I think rightfully so. My mind was reeling. I had to look away from that wall and gather my senses. As I sat and processed what I had seen, I heard Brother Oliver say, “What the fur!? There’s even a wiener dog disguised as a giraffe on here! I mean, they’re like 8 inches tall! Who do they think they’re fooling?”

Henry and Oliver investigating Thomas's secret

As I gathered my thoughts, Brother Oliver noticed a wiener dressed up like a giraffe.

As Brother Oliver continued to examine the wall, he kept remarking on what he saw. “Wieners taking on badgers? Really? I always thought Sir Thomas was exaggerating about the wiener dog’s combat capabilities! And here’s a wiener being pushed around in a stroller by a human! Do they have mind control capabilities similar to those that we cats possess?” Brother Oliver’s questions were really getting me worked up. I couldn’t stand still. I started pacing back and forth in Kitty Valhalla. I was so nervous though I was staying very low to the ground. Brother Oliver eventually told me to cut it out because I looked a little like a wiener dog.

Henry and Oliver investigating Thomas's secret

Brother Oliver’s questions while looking at the terrifying collage were getting me all amped up. I started pacing, but Brother O told me to stop because I looked like a wiener dog.

I stopped pacing as Brother Oliver had requested. After examining the wall a little longer, Brother Oliver turned away from it and said, “I am guessing, Brother Henry, that Sir Thomas collected all of this material off of the internet. Assuming that, I see two possibilities. Either Sir Thomas has been right all along and the wiener dogs really are the greatest threat to our continued existence, or all of this stuff was made up, for unknown reasons, by the humans that control the internet. I hope for our sake it’s the latter, although I have no idea why humans would waste so much time making this stuff up. Whether it’s made up or not though, Sir Thomas clearly takes it seriously, and we’re probably going to need to confront him eventually about what we have found here.”

Henry and Oliver investigating Thomas's secret

Brother Oliver said that whether the wiener stuff on the wall was made up or not, we’d probably have to confront Thomas about what we saw.

After speaking his mind, Brother Oliver got up and headed for the stairs. He instructed me to close the curtains and wipe out any paw prints or other traces that we had been in Valhalla. I did as instructed. As I headed downstairs, still processing all that I had seen, I heard Thomas’s voice coming up from the basement. I clearly heard him shout, “DIE WIENER, DIE!”, followed by a cry of “OUCH!” from Brother Oliver. Apparently, the Wiener Slayer score was now one to nothing.

So Says Brother Henry

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15 Comments

Filed under Daily Life

15 responses to “Uncovering The Secret Part III- All Is Revealed

  1. We think Thomas is readying himself for World Wiener Domination!

    Thank goodness at least ONE mystery is solved…

  2. mistletoeandhitch

    We are dumbfounded!

  3. OMG — that is very disturbing!

  4. Jenn

    This just made my Sunday!

  5. edithchase

    Sir Thomas has his work cut out for him, the weiner dogs have dragons and lobsters too 😉 He certainly worked hard putting together all that evidence.

  6. Oh no! The weiner dogs must be stopped. 😉

  7. rhiannonpaine

    Surely the humans who control the Internet have better things to do than spend hours creating pet-related material … oh, wait … I think maybe I just answered Brother Henry’s question. In which case Sir Thomas can rest easy, though somehow I think he’ll resist that explanation. In any case, excellent sleuthing, Sherlock Henry and Oliver Watson!

  8. msphoebecat

    My kitties Clove and Kaspars are now on edge after seeing this post, they always thought Sir Thomas exaggerated the threat of uprising but now they’re not sure! I hope you mancats can figure this out, as we are going to get no sleep in our house until I can prove to my cats they have no reason to worry. And convince myself I have no reason to worry either… MWAH!!!! 😻

  9. good heavens…we had no idea it was THAT bad….

  10. MOUSIEZ diz iz sum scarey infurmashun!
    Phankfully dere iz onlee 1 weiner poochie what bizitz da buildin n me stayz well away frum ‘it’…..
    Mind ya me Mum *squeelz wif deelite* n goez to pat said ‘it’ n coo at him…
    Makez diz kittehgurl *shudder*…
    Me must bee vigilantte on me Mum…
    Brotherz henry n Oliver ya did grrreat uncoverin diz n we hopez ya can help Sir Thomas in da guud fight….
    Sinseerlee, Nylablue xxxx

  11. Maybe it wasn’t Thomas. Maybe the Guardians did this after watching A Beautiful Mind.

  12. Pingback: Brother Henry Should Talk To Thomas | The Blog of Otis

  13. Jenn

    Guardians of the Cult, are you on Twitter? I’ve shared St. Spot’s story a couple of times, which I think is the wisest and most compassionate of the leaders Mandates. Would love to share back to your account, as I think many compassionate, but unaware humans need to be aware of His message. Thanks!

  14. Pingback: Next- The Wienervention Part III: We Don’t Know What To Think | The Blog of Otis

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