Thomas Was Up To Something

Disciples of The Leader Otis,

Brother Henry here.

Yesterday, when I was using the “kitty facilities” at the bottom of the steps to Kitty Valhalla, I thought I heard the sound of a voice coming from up there. After I completed my business, I snuck up the stairs to investigate. As I neared the top of the staircase, I heard the voice again. It was Thomas. He was speaking in a whisper, but I clearly heard him say, “Yes, my minions, you shall be my army. Together we will stand strong against the untold legions of wiener dogs that are plotting against us even as we speak. When they come for us, we will be ready. None shall withstand our plush counterattack! The wieners shall receive no quarter! No mercy! We shall…”

Thomas suddenly fell silent as I topped the stairs and came into his line of sight. I looked at him. He looked at me. Neither of us spoke for a moment.

Thomas looking innocent

Thomas stopped talking when I entered Valhalla. We both just looked at each other.

I broke the silence by saying, “Sir Thomas? What are you doing up here?” Thomas replied, “Uhhhh… well, Brother Henry, I… ummm… I was just meditating here on the Sacred Orange Pillow of Enlightenment!” I said, “Really, Sir Thomas? Because I thought I heard…” Thomas cut me off by saying, “Uhhh… all you heard was me meditating, Brother Henry. See?” And then Thomas closed his eyes and started saying, “Meohm… Meohm… Meohm”, as if he were trying to induce a meditative state.

Thomas pretending to meditate

Thomas said he was just meditating, but I know what I heard.

Although I knew for a fact that Thomas had not been meditating, I decided not to stick around and argue with him. I had better things to do… plus, all those plush animals were kind of freaking me out.

So Says Brother Henry

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Filed under Daily Life

20 responses to “Thomas Was Up To Something

  1. Don’t worry Sir Thomas….every knight needs minions

  2. I’m with you Brother Henry! That smiling red gremlin in the middle really freaks me out!! 🙂

  3. Wiener dogs are very afraid of plush toys based on the local wiener dog’s response to a stuffed straw man we put out at Thanksgiving!

  4. Yeah, best to keep Thomas…. and those creepy plush thingies….. on your side.

  5. Lindsay Gower

    Not to worry, Henry. It’s only when you hear the minions reply to Sir Thomas that you truly need to worry.

  6. That was nice of you to let Thomas have his minions, Henry.

  7. I have a frog and a reindeer as minions. I don’t know what a wiener dog is but if one shows up I am ready.

  8. Ooo minions! Great work gathering up an army, Thomas! No weiner is gonna get the drop on you! Well, they couldnt get a ‘drop’ on anyone, could they? hee hee

  9. Sir Thomas has minions!!! We are all safe now.

  10. rhiannonpaine

    This post gave me a much-needed laugh out loud, Brother Henry. It started with the word “minion” (you cats have great vocabularies, BTW); turned into a guffaw with “None shall withstand our plush counterattack!” (which is going to be my new catchphrase, even though it’s kind of long for a catchphrase); and escalated to a belly laugh when I got to”meohm.” I hope that your ability to write such a funny post means your mouth is feeling better now.

  11. Wow what a unique army he has!!

  12. Sandy

    Well, we really don’t know what happens at night (ahem, anyone see Toy Story?). Thanks to Thomas for his planning and preparation in case those wiener dogs attack!

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  14. Yow Brother Henry me finkz ya did da rite fing just walkin away!! Sir Thomas waz obveeussly purracticin hiz knitely dutiez wif da stuffiez…or else he haz lost hiz mind n iz commandin a stuffie army….
    Meohm indeed!! 😉
    Lub Nylablue =^,,^=

  15. msphoebecat

    Yeah the red demon thing is a bit scary! It’s okay Sir Thomas, we all have our talk to ourselves as if we ruled the world moments!

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