Disciples of Otis,
Brother Oliver here. Long time Disciples are likely aware of Brother Henry’s challenges with Kitty Body Awareness Deficit Syndrome (KBADS). Well, it seems like Brother Henry might be experiencing a flare up of the dreaded disorder. Last night, I walked out into The Leader’s Outdoor Domain to find Brother Henry standing with his two front paws in a box.
I asked Brother Henry what he was doing and he replied, “I thought I heard a dog barking earlier, so I came out here to look for any potential LFDU activity. I didn’t see any sign of The Mongrel Horde, but I did find this awesome box! It’s very spacious, and there is so much room for activities!” To demonstrate his point, Brother Henry stood up, shifted positions and stretched… all the while keeping his front paws firmly planted in the box.
After stretching, Brother Henry sat back down and said, “So I like the roominess of the box, but there’s one thing about it that is weird. Even though the bottom of the box looks pretty uniform, half of it is nice and smooth, and the other half is very rough. I don’t know why. It’s probably one of those weird optical delusions or whatever they’re called…”
Brother Henry is a very sensitive kitty. I really didn’t want to point out that he was having a KBADS moment as I knew it would embarrass him. I know I don’t normally pass up a chance to make a good joke, but I know Brother Henry is powerless against this affliction. Making fun of him for it would just be mean. Instead, I said, “That sure does sound like a strange box, Brother Henry. Maybe I’ll have to give it a sit sometime to experience the weirdness for myself.” Then I got up and headed back inside.
As I left, I heard Brother Henry say, “Yes! You should definitely try it sometime… but I recommend sitting on the smooth side. I’m finding that the rough end of the box is quite chafing on the bum…” I waited until I was all the way inside, and well out of earshot for Brother Henry, before I fell into a fit of uncontrollable laughter.
So Sayeth Brother Oliver