As you are probably aware, I was born the son of two feral cats. My parents and I were just three out of twenty-three kitties that were left behind when an elderly cat hoarder was moved to a retirement home. Those who became the Guardians of Otis recognized our plight and worked for four years to bring us all out of the shadows and into the light. But they did not do it alone. A non-profit organization called PAWS in Lynnwood, WA provided sheltering and adoption services for the kitties from My flock that were adoptable. They also provided humane euthanasia for a number of kitties that were suffering from severe, terminal illnesses, including My sister Marvie. PAWS’s support was invaluable to the Guardians, and to those kitties. Now The Brothers, Thomas and I would like to try to repay the favor with a little support of our own.
Every year, PAWS holds a fundraiser called PAWSwalk. It is a big event in a park that involves thousands of people walking thousands of dogs. Needless to say, none of us kitties are going anywhere near that park, but we are still going to try to collect donations to support PAWS’s lifesaving work with animals (yes, even dogs). To that end, we have created a Cult of Otis team on the PAWSwalk website, and we four kitties are going to try to raise as much money as possible.
Now, in the interests of full disclosure, I need to tell you that one of the Guardians works at PAWS. Rather than working with domestic animals though, he works with the wildlings, helping those that are sick and injured, and returning them to the wilderness. He does help kitties at work, but they are much larger and a lot wilder than your average house cat.
So, while we were making our team page, The Brothers, Thomas and I got into a little bit of an argument about whom among us would raise the most money. We finally decided that we should each make our own donation page and settle the argument once and for all. Of course, as The Leader of this cult, I’m pretty sure I’m going to raise the most. If you would like to support Me in this endeavor, you can head on over to My personal donation page.
Whoa! Wait, wait, wait! Not so fast there Leader O. Hi Everyone. Brother Oliver here. I respect Leader Otis’s confidence that He will be the top fundraiser, but I don’t think He should write the rest of us off so quickly… especially me! I may not be as “leaderly” or charismatic as Leader Otis, but there’s a reason I am called “The Brains” of this operation. I’ll use my superior intellect to make sure the most donations come funneling my way. Yep. I sure will. Hmmmm… now how can I do that… I know! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! GIVE ON MY DONATION PAGE!
Wow! What a couple of amateurs. Hi Disciples of Otis. Brother Henry here. Let me tell you why you should support my fundraising efforts. As you all know, I have long stood as our first line of defense against the Long-feared Dog Uprising. It is well known that dogs who have loving Guardians are less likely to join canine militant factions that are in league with the LFDU. Among the many things that PAWS does, they take in stray and owner-surrendered cats and dogs and adopt them out to caring forever homes. I’m sure their work has prevented countless canines from turning to the “bark side”. And, of course, my tireless work has ensured that none of us are caught unaware by those dogs that have joined the Mongrel Horde. Clearly, the best way to prove they you are not an agent of the LFDU is to donate on my page! Those that do not donate may end up on the terrierist watch list!
Ummmm… hi. It’s Thomas. I’ve never really done anything like this before and, to tell you the truth, I was a little bit nervous about trying to raise money when some of it might go to the dogs. Ummm… the main reason was because I was scared that a wiener dog might get his paws on that cash, and then… then…. oh, the thought is too horrifying to even finish. Anyway, Brother Oliver assured me that PAWS would never support wiener dogs [*note from Brother Oliver- that is totally not true] so I agreed to help. Also, Brother Oliver said that, since PAWS is a non-profit place, all donations are tax dead-duckable. I found this to be a bit weird, since I thought that an animal place wouldn’t kill ducks, but… WHAT? WHAT’S THAT BROTHER OLIVER? Oh. Not tax “dead-duckable”. It’s really tax “dee-duck-table”. I still don’t know what that means, but it sounds less fatal to the ducks so I guess it’s good. All right. Well, please help me raise the most money to help the animals. If I win…. hmmmm… what can I do… I KNOW! If I win I will show you the best Flying Squirrel you ever saw! If you would like to see that, donate on my page today!
There you have it, My Disciples. If you choose to support any of us individually or all of us as a team, we greatly appreciate it, and so do the thousands of animals that PAWS helps every year. Thank you!
So Sayeth Otis