I admit it, I’m a little bitter, but Brother Oliver just won’t shut up about it! Apparently, he just happened to go downstairs this morning at the exact moment the Guardians were removing a load of sheets and towels from the laundry warming device. They dumped them in a pile on the bed, and Brother Oliver immediately threw himself upon their toasty goodness.
Now, Brother Oliver claims that this warm laundry was unlike any warm laundry he had ever encountered. The pile had just the right combination of sheets and towels, and they joined together to make the ultimate in toasty comfort. He said he felt like he was the king kitty of the world.
I know I should probably be very happy with Brother Oliver, but as I said, I am a little bitter. Why, you ask? Well, I’m bitter because Brother Oliver could have shouted out, “Leader Otis! Come quick! I have found the best pile of laundry ever!” But he didn’t do that. Instead he chose to keep it all to himself.
I know I should expect such things from Brother Oliver, after all he is the most, shall we say, independently minded of My High Priests. Still, this kind of insubordination is nearly unforgivable. I shall have to think long and hard to find a punishment that fits the severity of this crime.
So Sayeth Otis