Tool Belt Tony’s Tutorial

My Disciples,

As you may be aware, the Guardians sometimes refer to Me as “Tool Belt Tony” on account of My affinity for tools and building projects. Well, I do consider Myself to be a bit of an expert on the proper use of tools and, being a generous Leader, I like to share My knowledge whenever the opportunity arises. This morning I discovered that the Guardians left a screwdriver on the living room floor, so I thought I would seize the moment and give you a quick tutorial on the proper way to use this basic tool. Here we go.

Toolbelt Tony 1

The first thing you’ll want to do is get into the proper position to pick up the tool. I recommend using a lateral approach as demonstrated here.

Toolbelt Tony 2

Depending on where your Guardian leaves their tools, you may have to reach over obstacles to grab them. Here is the proper technique.

Toolbelt Tony 3

Now, to pull the tool toward you, you might need to grip the end of it in your teeth, like vith.

Toolbelt Tony 4

Mehk thur oo keef ur teef ahn thandle an moof had towad oo.

 

Toolbelt Tony 5

Ath oo reless wiff ur mouff… catch the screwdriver with your paws so it doesn’t fall away.

Toolbelt Tony 6

Now, go ahead and… graf whiff ur teef ag’n an…

Toolbelt Tony 7

… trn ur had ag’n pull’n scoodrife trd oo.

Toolbelt Tony 8

Rlee puff et don tho oo c’n grap et will.

Toolbelt Tony 9

There! Now you are ready to properly use the screwdriver!

All that’s left to do is to wait for someone to bring you a screw and two pieces of wood that they want to join together. They should put the screw on the end of your screwdriver, hold the wood up against the tip of the screw and turn the wood until the screw is all the way in. So easy!

I hope you have found this tutorial enlightening. I may have more in the future if the Guardians should once again forget to put away their tools. I’m hoping they leave out the circular saw!

So Sayeth Tool Belt Tony

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29 Comments

Filed under Daily Life

29 responses to “Tool Belt Tony’s Tutorial

  1. Ha ha! Thank you for the tutorial, Leader! 😀

  2. mistletoeandhitch

    I so wish someone was there with a screw that needed tightening. Oh well, perhaps next time. Your mastery of tools is extremely impressive Leader Otis. You must be very proud of your skill.

  3. Aha…! I KNEW Mr Chitters had been sneaking my iPad and reading this blog! I wondered where he learned his technique for handling my paintbrushes and now I KNOW! Otis’s influence is more widespread than I realized…

  4. hopewellmomschoolagain

    Otis! You talented kitty!! And your tummy is gorgeous!!

  5. Very informative! I see a How-to Series of books authored by you Otis! Best sellers!

  6. Batya

    Love it! Proves that lying down on the job is necessary!

  7. Very…..ahem….helpful! 😀

  8. Hee hee there really is no end to your talents!! I can’t wait to see what you build!

  9. saymber

    You are quite the Renaissance cat my boy Otis! Great photos of you demonstrating your technique 🙂

  10. Otis, are you available for home repairs? We so need a handy-cat here.

  11. Pingback: Inside the Mystery Box | The Blog of Otis

  12. Pingback: Brother Oliver Was Moved By The Spirit Again | The Blog of Otis

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