Fool Me You Can’t Get Fooled Again

My Disciples,

Brother Oliver was faking his amnesia! I discovered this yesterday when one of the Guardians shook the container of freeze-dried chicken bits and shouted out the familiar “Who wants chicken!?” call. The call was coming from the kitchen, and when I ran in there Brother Oliver was already there waiting for his treat. I said, “Brother Oliver! I thought you had amnesia! How did you know what ‘who wants chicken’ meant?” He looked at Me sheepishly and said, “Oh, ummm, I didn’t. I just heard the Guardian calling and I ran in here to see what was up.” I then said, “And how do you know that this human is one of the Guardians when you didn’t even recognize Me as The Leader?” He looked at Me with a stumped expression on his face.

In that moment I remembered a time in My younger years when the Guardians had been watching a news report on TV. The person who was speaking seemed to be an important figure, but I’m not sure who it was because I missed the first part of the show. Anyway, whoever that person was, he said something very profound that I thought was relevant to the current situation. I tried to repeat what that man had said to Brother Oliver. I said, “Brother Oliver, fool me once shame on… shame on you. Fool me… you can’t get fooled again.” I regretted the words as soon as they had left My mouth.

Defiant Otis

I repeated the profound words of that mystery man on TV. I regretted it immediately afterward.

Brother Oliver stared at Me for a moment with a look of both confusion and awe. Then he burst out laughing harder than I have ever seen him laugh. Through his guffaws he said, “All right Leader Otis, you got me. I was totally faking the amnesia, but now I think you might have been hit on the head too hard or something. I mean, who talks like that? I’m very sorry, but with all due respect, that is one of the dumbest things I have ever heard anyone say.”

The worst thing about the situation was that Brother Oliver was right. I knew the words were completely idiotic even as I heard Myself say them. I had only said them because, in some recess of My mind, it seemed like they had been said by an important person. But I must have been mistaken. Perhaps the part of the news report that I missed had explained that the story was about the decline of intelligence in America or something. But it was too late to worry about that. I had said what I had said, and Brother Oliver was still in the process of having a good laugh at My expense.

So I did the only remaining thing that I could do. I snapped up both My chicken treat and the one that had been put down for Brother Oliver, and I ran out of the room. As I exited, I heard Brother Oliver’s laughter suddenly cease. I then heard him say, in a very humble voice, “I can’t believe he fooled me…”

So Sayeth Otis

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Filed under Daily Life

9 responses to “Fool Me You Can’t Get Fooled Again

  1. MOL, poor Otis! but you sure got yours back, didn’t you! Good job!

  2. raven's witch

    OMG! seriously laughing out loud for real!! i love cats…anything cats and i’m there 🙂

  3. O you have so much fun in your house!!

  4. Otis, you are so smart. Using profound words to bewilder and confuse…so you can grab the treats!

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