As you are aware, I am much smaller than both Brothers Henry and Oliver. This is mostly due to My incredible svelteness, but it is also because My growth was stunted by My early days as a kitten wandering alone in the wilderness. This has never been a source of insecurity for Me, but I have often wondered what it would feel like to be 16.5 pounds of tabby fury like Brother Oliver, or 17 pounds of tabby fury like Brother Henry. Well, the Guardians must have sensed that I was wondering these things because they placed a bed in Kitty Valhalla that magically gives Me the feeling that I am much larger! I have dubbed it “The Sacred Bed of Embigening”.
I must say, it has been quite enlightening to lay in The Sacred Bed of Embigening and experience what life must be like for larger kitties. I mean, I couldn’t even tuck myself into it all the way! My paws got cold! Brothers Oliver and Henry must feel this way even in a normal, non-embigening bed, so, more than anything else, The Sacred Bed of Embigening made Me realize how much The Brothers must appreciate it when I squeeze into a bed with them. Clearly I must provide them with much needed foot-warming. That’s probably why they always sigh so loudly when I cram Myself in next to them! It just makes Me feel good to know that I am providing them such a valuable service. After all, My High Priests are worth it.
So Sayeth Otis