My Disciples,
I have a problem. No, it’s not with catnip bananas or prescription medicine bottles. It’s with big, fluffy kitty tails. Whenever I see a big, fluffy tail, I just have to grab it and rub it against My cheeks. I do this all the time with Mama Cat’s tail when she comes close enough to My Outdoor Domain for Me to grab it. Yeah, she gets mad, but she gets over it quickly. Well, I just noticed last night that there is another kitty with a big, fluffy tail. It just so happens that his name is… errrr… Thomas. I’m so ashamed of what I did!
I’m mad at Myself for what I did last night. I’m also very ashamed.
See, The Brothers, one of the Guardians and I were visiting Thomas in Kitty Valhalla last night. We were all playing and having a great time. In fact, Thomas seemed more comfortable than he has been in weeks. He even came out of his little hidey hole and started wandering around the room. He walked all the way over to the door to look out, turning his back to all of us in an unusual show of trust and… that’s when I saw it. His big, fluffy tail was swishing back and forth in all of its glory.
Before I even knew what I was doing, I sprang forward and grabbed that tail, intending to give it a robust nuzzling. The moment My paws closed around Thomas’s tail, I knew I had made a mistake. Thomas reacted so fast that I never even saw it coming. With a deafening hiss issuing from the depths of his very being, he swung round in a blur and landed two mighty blows on My head with one of his front paws. Stunned, I was sent reeling backwards while Thomas made a beeline back to his hidey hole.
Brother Henry shouted, “Leader Otis! Why did you do that…errr…and are you OK!?” Gathering Myself, I told him that I was OK, but that we needed to check on Thomas. We both jumped up on the bench above Thomas (fearing that he might decide to deliver a few more blows) and tried to talk to him. I said I was sorry for grabbing his tail, but he just kept repeating, “I knew it! I knew something bad would happen if I went out there! I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!”
I apologized, and we tried to reassure Thomas, but he was inconsolable. He wouldn’t even look at us.
The Guardians must have seen that we weren’t making any progress because they ushered The Brothers and Me out of the room. They then spent a little more time with Thomas before coming out themselves. I really didn’t mean to scare Thomas but I just couldn’t help Myself! Blast My obsession with fluffy tails!
So Sayeth Otis
Cult of Otis shirts, posters, mugs, stickers and more!
poor Thomas.
One of my cats chases his own tail, maybe you should stick to doing that Otis.
But My tail is just a normally fluffy tail, 2 cats. It just can’t compare to Thomas or Mama Cat’s super fluffy tails!
Admitting you have a problem is a good first step. Perhaps you can refocus this obsession into a similarly fluffy feather toy? I’m still glad You and the Brothers are spending time with Thomas.
Hmmmm… you might be on to something there Christine. I shall command the Guardians to find an artificial source of fluffiness to meet My needs!
Oh, Otis, for shame.
I know, Wazeau… I am so ashamed…
Poor Thomas! I hope one day he is able to emerge from Kitty Valhalla…. and not have you go after his tail!
Me too Rumpy. I will try to control Myself.
Don’t worry Otis, I’m sure was just a minor setback and Thomas will be fine again soon!!
Thanks Cat’s Cats. I hope you are right.
RC Cat insists you relay her sympathy to Thomas. As a formerly tiny kitty blessed with a hugh elegant fluffy tail, she too has been the target of attacks. Purring to perfection to you Thomas! Be brave!
(Otis, we are assuring RC that Thomas wasn’t really attacked – just subjected to an impulsive action….RC is busy sending comforting purrs to Thomas)
RC Cat sounds like she has a magnificent tail. Can she come over and play? Doh! Blast My obsession!
RC Cat said to relay that along with the regal tail, she also has some large pounding paws that kept the German in place….and she might consider touring your realm in order to give Thomas some pointers!
RUN OTIS!
As I discovered, Thomas is already quite capable of using his own pounding paws!
(Sorry, Otis. I can sympathize from having to live with pounding paws)
Wow, you did a great thing by admitting your problem. That’s the first step. Now you just need to get yourself into a 12 step program like flufftail addicts anonymous! (FTAA for short) I’m sure Thomas will understand, eventually.
Thanks Andrea. I wonder if there’s a chapter of FTAA near Me?
I say hooray for Thomas…that he let you know he didn’t like what you did before he went back to hiding. He is getting enough confidence to defend himself. I understand your problem though. I just love Mama’s pajama pant legs and I like to tug on them. She doesn’t like it. But it is so fun when she tries to shake me off.
Teddy
He sure did let Me know he didn’t like it Teddy. That little guy really packs a punch. These pajama pant legs of which you speak sound like a lot of fun!
Oh Otis
I can understand your temptation. Fluffy cat tails are so hard to resist. As are furry cat tummies and soft kitty paws 
But we all have to learn, sometimes the hard way, to resist such temptations unless we know they will be accepted. Thomas will have to get used to a bit of rough and tumble living in a home with 3 other kitties. I’m sure he’ll get over it, but next time do try and be strong 
I’ll try My hardest, Knotrune!
Seems like Thomas could use some “Safe Spaces” from Spirit Essences. and Otis needs a nice big fluffy tail of his very own to nuzzle when ever the need arises.
I do need a big, fluffy snuggle-able tail, Connie!
Awww, poor Thomas, and poor you. I’m imagining Thomas has recovered. But you, Otis, you have to figure something out so this doesn’t happen again. I wonder if there are fluffy tail extensions for kitties, like they have hair extensions for humans, so you could have your own fluffy tail to pounce on.
Do you think there are things like that lemonysqueezes? That sounds perfect!
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